When Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemon Drop Martinis

We can’t pretend that there is not a worldwide pandemic. We can’t change the fact that our lives are altered or deny that it will take time to recover. But we can choose how we think about it and what our mindset is. And in choice, there is power.

We can choose to see the isolation as an act of love. All over the world people are staying in their homes with the sole purpose of stopping the spread of the virus. Everyone is united in this one purpose. This shift in mindset can help to lift our mood.

Similarly, we can change one word to shift our mindset. Change “have” in our daily discourse to “get”. I have to stay home because of social distancing and our country’s isolation policy becomes I get to stay home to protect my community from the spread of the coronavirus. I have to cancel all my appointments becomes I get to reschedule my appointments and now I have more time to write my book. I have to stop eating out with my boyfriend becomes I get to order delivery and support local businesses (and try all those recipes I have been collecting on Pinterest).

The most difficult challenge to everyone facing a pandemic is existential in that “it refers to your ability to face a crisis with competence and understanding of where your life is now and where it may be going after it is over”. This existential crisis tests your strength and your resilience. This is a time to take stock of who we are. “He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened”. It is a difficult challenge, but knowing yourself reduces panic and anxiety.

As baby boomers, we have the luxury of taking time to process our feelings and to reflect on the present and how it may change our future. Unlike our adult children, we are not balancing the demands of working from home with home schooling children. And millennials are feeling pressure now to “organize every room in the home, become an expert home chef, write a prize winning novel and get in shape with internet pushup challenges. “The internet wants you to believe you aren’t doing enough with all that extra time you have now, but staying home and attending to your basic needs is plenty”. We all need to practice self care during these challenging times.

Some good advice on managing your emotional health during difficult times is the following:

Align your needs with what is happening in the present.

Analyze your resources e.g. what is available to you in the present.

Stay in the present–worry will not help to end the crisis any sooner.

Be with your own thoughts and process your feelings without being reactive.

Stay calm; think of the crisis as a human correction in your life. Every crisis shakes loose the old order and demands a review of old mindsets and opinions.

Are you sensing a pattern here? present, present, present. We have time to deal with the future. As a previous lifelong worrier, two events cured me of that terrible affliction: my twin sister’s untimely death and taking the Dale Carnegie course after law school graduation at the age of forty.

Aside from Carnegie’s positive affirmation regarding making lemonade when life throws you lemons, I live by his advice to “live in day tight compartments”. We need to discipline ourselves to focus our thinking on the here and now and taking action. We can all get through one day at a time.

Sending virtual hugs to you all. Stay safe and healthy! XO Penny

“You didn’t make it this far by giving up when the going got tough. The future will be filled with challenges waiting to become opportunities. Embrace them!” Margaret Manning, Sixtyandme.com

Resources

“How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, by Dale Carnegie

“Stop Trying to Be Productive”, by Taylor Lorenz The New York Times

“Manage Your Mental and Emotional Health in Difficult Times”, by Joan Francis Moran sixtyandme.com

“Three Mindset Shift Strategies to Help Any Extrovert Settle in the Time of Coronavirus”, by Jude Walsh sixtyandme.com